How not to talk to a Mistress
Rather handily there is a link on this site, which means you, my little potential worms, can actually email me.

****Never, ever, I repeat ever, send me unsolicited genitalia photos. You will be blocked immediately and plonked unceremoniously in my JUNK folder. Women don’t like that shit. Seriously, stop it! (and I’ve seen enough shrivelled little chipolatas to last me a lifetime)****

Never begin an email with the following:
“yo”
“hey babe”
“s’up?”
“let’s fuck”
“wyd?”
“do you do free sessions?”
“will you be my girlfriend?”


If you confuse ‘your’ and ‘you’re’ I will not be impressed. In fact I will make certain judgements about you, and as much as these judgements will make me want to kick you repeatedly in the gonads, I also will not want to spend much time in your ill-educated company.

ALWAYS capitalise the ‘M’ in ‘Mistress’.
ALWAYS write a polite and courteous email. This will always get you noticed.
ALWAYS use apostrophes correctly (as well as a sadist, I’m a grammar pedant).

1. I will be addressed as ‘Mistress’ or ‘Mistress Natasha’ in all sessions.

2. You will arrive clean, showered and on time.

3. I will require at least 24 hours advance notice.

4. Newcomers will be required to pay a deposit in advance.

5. I will expect a ‘gift’ in addition to my tribute.

Manchester Mistress Natasha Poole